| I've Been Deleted, Therefore, I am Not |
A Most Average Beginning “I've been deleted” said John to Kurt. Kurt was sitting on John's floor looking through CDs and deciding what to put on. John was staring at his computer screen wondering why he'd been deleted off the face of Floyd's MySpace. “What?” asked Kurt. “I've been deleted” “What?” “Floyd deleted me!” said John. “What?” asked Kurt. “Jesus Christ, Floyd deleted me off his MySpace!” screamed John. “So?” asked Kurt, Kurt was full of one word questions. “So? How can you say that? He deleted me from his friends list, which, if I'm not mistaken, means he no longer acknowledges my existence, which means, I don't exist” said John. “What?” asked Kurt. “What what?” “What is a 'MySpace'?” asked Kurt. Kurt was one of John's friends from his job and had subsequently never met any of John's other 'outside-of-work' friends. “You serious?” asked John. “Yeah” “Jesus Christ, MySpace is like it, man. IT, the big IT” said John. “It?” “Yeah, it. Everyone has one and if you don't have one, you don't exist. People no longer communicate through any other means than through MySpace, shit, people rarely meet people outside of MySpace” said John, clicking angrily on his mouse. “That's stupid” said Kurt. “What's stupid?” asked John, clicking furiously and also doing a lot of typing, furiously. “MySpace” said Kurt. “How can you say THAT? You can't say things like that!” said John, turning to face Kurt for the first time during the conversation. “I can” said Kurt, “I just did. Can I borrow this please?” asked Kurt as he thrust Burning the Hard City by Djam Karet out towards John. “Not until you acknowledge that MySpace isn't stupid” said John. “Well, it is stupid. From your description, it sounds stupid. People go around making lists of their friends and then when they no longer want to be friends, they delete you and say nothing of the fact that they no longer consider you a friend, that, is stupid” said Kurt. “No, its not” said John. “Fucking. Stupid. If I no longer wish to associate myself with someone, I tell them, I wouldn't be all sneaky and delete them from a list I made. That's so childish,” said Kurt, now adopting a really mocking tone of voice, “Oooh, look at me, I've made a list of all my friends. Look there's Sarah and Sally and Matt and Luke and Troy. But, wait, I no longer like Luke, cross him out, there, no longer my friend” said Kurt. “It's not like that” said John. “Oh, then what is it like?” asked Kurt. “It's a way of networking online. You keep a list of people you like and you contact them through it” said John. “OK, what's wrong with meeting up in a bar or phoning someone up?” asked Kurt. “But this is online. It lets you edit the page as well, make it look however you like it!” exclaimed John, for he did love exclaiming. “So? That has nothing to do with the fact that its a childish thing to be doing, adding and deleting friends, I mean, that is really stupid” said Kurt. “I'm going to send a message to Floyd and ask him why he deleted me! No, wait, I'll try adding him again! Will that make you happy?” asked John. “No, why don't you act like a normal human being, well, a 'what-used-to-be-normal' human being and call him or go and see him and find out from the horse's mouth and not through some stupid e-mail!” said Kurt as he put the CD he wanted to borrow in his bag and got up to leave. “Where you going?” asked John. “I'm going to meet up with Sarah, Sally and Troy at The Pelican, wanna come?” asked Kurt. “Nah, I've got MySpace things to do” said John. “That's stupid” said Kurt as he left. A Most Average End |
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